Episode #30 is our DIRTY THIRTY…and we really torture the $%@& out of each other…

Posted on

Hello, friends! It’s our Dirty Thirty, and we are REALLY set on being dirty to each other…

We have such things to show you…

First up is Paul’s torture-session. I begged him to just stick needles in my eyes, but instead he insisted on making me watch Draft Day, featuring Kevin Costner in a role obviously meant for a much younger actor…

“My dad is only four years older than me…”

I then hit Paul square in the solar plexis with the fantasy musical Xanadu. A place where dreams come true, and a place where Greek muses wear legwarmers and speak with Australian accents…

“I may be smiling, but this pink light burns like %$&@…”

We also eat alcoholic gummie bears, Paul shares his Paul Park Figures, and we rank the last ten movies we’ve made each other watch.

Come get dirty with us, won’t you?



Draft Day – 2014
Xanadu – 1980


Posted on
Breakin’ the law! Breakin’ the law!

Hey everyone! We’re back, and we’re breaking all of our rules with #29! 

This time we decided to break out of usual format and do some cult TV, some cult ALMOST-TV, and a movie we’ve both seen already (we’ve broken that rule before, but whatever; it’s still rule-breakin’).

My pick this time around is the notorious Mr. Mike’s Mondo Video, the scandalous 1979 TV pilot by the incomparable Michael O’Donaghue.  This program was intended as a “week off” show for Saturday Night Live way back in it’s second season, but the network guys only watched about five minutes of this bizarro oddity and said no way are going to air this on network television…

Mr. Mike and one of his illustrious guest stars…

For my viewing pleasure Paul chose Crime Story, the 1980’s TV series by 80’s mainstay Michael Mann.  Starring Dennis Farina, this 60’s period piece is part film noir throwback, part social commentary, and part great 60’s playlist.


A screenshot of Dennis Farina relaxing…

Our third choice this time around comes courtesy of our special guest Christine Adams: the homage to 80’s materialism American Psycho, starring Christian Bale in his star-making turn as Patrick Bateman. Based on the novel by Bret Easton Ellis, this film blew my mind when it came out in 2000, and all three of were thrilled to break our rules to talk about this very polarizing film…

The 80’s were such a mellow time…

We had a blast recording this episode, as always, but it was a special treat to break out of our usual routine and discuss these three oh-so-different programs.  We also talk about what we’ve been watching lately (IT, anyone?) and we announce what we’ll be doing for episode #30…

Won’t you join us?


Crime Story – 1986-1988
American Psycho – 2000







Episode #28 – The Back To School Special!

Posted on

Paul and I decided that Episode #28 would be our salute to Back To School Season, and we each found a 90’s movie to fit the bill perfectly, in fact it’s one of our favorite double-features so far!

Paul chose the 1996 film The Substitute starring Tom Berenger, Ernie Hudson, and…Marc Anthony?!?!?!

Wait. That’s not Tom Berenger…

I picked the Robert Rodriguez helmed scifi/horror flick The Faculty from 1998 starring Elijah Wood, Josh Hartnett…and Usher?!?!?!

Um, no: still not Tom Berenger…

We also talk about what we’ve been up to lately, what we’re watching, and what laws we plan to break next time around so we have to go to detention.

Nope. Not even close.

So please don’t miss the bus and be late to school!  If you don’t you’ll miss all the fun, and you’ll never know if I ever found the right movie to watch!

Won’t you join us?


Ah. There it is.
“The Substitute” – 1996
“The Faculty” – 1998

#27 has us camping it up…and living in a Ghost World…

Posted on

Hello, friends!  We’re back with Episode #27, and it’s full of camp fun and esoteric hipness!  This time around I REALLY GOT PAUL GOOD: I made him watch 1967’s Valley of the Dolls, and he may never, never forgive me.  You’ve really got to hear him to know how much pain I inflicted on him.  It was delicious.

She woke up like this…

Then we talk about Paul’s pick, 2001’s Ghost World, directed by the talented Terry Zwigoff, who also directed one of my favorite documentaries, Crumb.  The movie stars Thora Birch, Scarlett Johansson, and Steve Buscemi, and it could not be more different from Valley of the Dolls if it tried.

Paul’s expression when he realized he was only halfway through Valley of the Dolls…

Find out how this graphic novel turned into a film made me react, and also find out which movies we will be covering next time in Episode #28 (classic slasher horror and basketball and romance are involved, FYI).

Won’t you join us?




#26 is our One Year Anniversary episode!

Posted on

Episode #26 is here, and it marks our one year anniversary!  Yes, believe it or not, this insanity has been going on for an entire year! And still no bloodshed or emergency room visits!

“Thank you, Simon! Cheers to you as well!”

To celebrate this twelve-month miracle we are bringing you a classic HYSTO episode…with just a couple of extra, gorgeous little things…

Babes & Bullets! It ain’t a party without ’em…

Our first film is Paul’s choice, the POW camp film Stalag 17, a 1953 gem by acclaimed director Billy Wilder.  I had heard great things about this one, but somehow never saw it…until now!

“Stalag 17” star William Holden, 1953, at the height of his hotness (thank you, Paul).

My choice this time around was the 1987 scifi film The Hidden, starring Twin Peak‘s Kyle Maclachlan and Flashdance‘s Michael Nouri.

Michael Nouri in deep thought in The Hidden. (Sigh)

Later, we each divulge which films were our tip-top tortures and treasures, I give Paul a quiz about films we have covered, and (of course) we announce which films are up for discussion for episode #27.

We had a really, really good time recording this one.  Paul even brought some bubbly (sparkling water) and, since it is our anniversary, I gave Paul jewelry (a Ring Pop, to be exact…strawberry).  This is a party you won’t want to miss!

Won’t you join us?


The Hidden poster – 1987


Stalag 17 poster – 1957

Episode #25 is alive! Well, most of it is…

Posted on
12 Angry Men lobby card – 1957

We’re back with #25, friends!  We’ve got two very different movies to talk about this time around (isn’t that the HYSTO way?).

Our first victim is the 2004 hit Shaun of the Dead, starring the amazing Simon Pegg.  I mean it.  The man is amazing.

“You’re welcome, Simon.”

After that we switch gears IN A BIG WAY when we discuss 12 Angry Men starring acting legend Henry Fonda and a cast of heavy hitters.  How have I never seen this movie?  Well, now’s my chance.

Let’s play “What Part Did Paul Play In His High School Production”…

We also have Paul Park Figures this time around,what we’re enjoying right now, and we both share our five favorite movie watching moments.  We had so much fun making this one.

Won’t you join us?








#24 is a classic HYSTO episode – but is there movie torture?

Posted on
“Baby Face” 1933 poster

Hello HYSTO-philes!  Episode #24 is here, and it’s classic HYSTO all the way!  This time around I make Paul watch the 1933 film Baby Face starring Barbara Stanwyck in one of her finest pre-code roles.

Theresa Harris & Barbara Stanwyck in “Baby Face” – 1933

Paul’s choice for me this time around is 1998’s Kissing A Fool, starring Brandon Lee (Chasing Amyand David Schwimmer of Friends fame.

Brandon Lee & David Schwimmer – “Kissing A Fool” – 1998

We also talk about what we’re watching lately and, of course, what we are making each other watch for next time in episode #25.  Did we choose treasure or torture films for each other?  Join us to find out!





Episode #23 with Special Guest Keith Karseno! Homies, Hooties, and Zombies!

Posted on

The Big Doll House – 1971 – Dir. Jack Hill


Hello friends!  We are back with episode #23, and we are joined by our good friend Keith Karseno, who adds his two-cents to the comments on the films High School High, The Big Doll House, and Train To Busan.


Warning: there may be side effects from watching all three movies in a row…

The three of us had the best time ever talking about these very, very different movies and, as usual, we also stray off to many other unrelated topics that have nothing to do with the film in question.  What can we say?  It’s the HYSTO way!


How did this face not become THE leading man of filmdom?

It’s one of our longest and most fun episodes yet.  Won’t you join us?





Hold those jazz-hands high for #22, our “JAZZISODE!!!”

Posted on
Jump for Jazz!

Hello, friends!  We’re back with Episode #22, our “Jazzisode!” This time around we take on two films that have definite jazz connections.  Paul is a HUGE jazz music fan, so you’ll for sure want to tune in to hear what his thoughts are on these two very different movies…

Paul choose 1988’s “Bird” directed by Clint Eastwood.  It’s hard to believe I had never seen this well-known biography…

Forest Whitaker as Charlie “Bird” Parker – 1988

I picked last year’s big hit “La La Land” directed by Damien Chazzelle, and joining us to discuss this modern-marvel of a movie is our friend Mr. Knives Monroe.

Emma Stone & Ryan Gosling in La La Land – 2016

We have a lot of fun discussing these two films, and along the way we talk about what we’re watching right now, Paul almost tells a story about midget hookers, and of course we divulge what movies we’ll be talking about next time (hint: they involve a women’s prison, zombies, and Jon Lovitz…).

Won’t you join us?






Episode #21 aka The “Wesisode!” A Wes Anderson Triple Feature!

Posted on
“The Wesi-what?”

Hello friends!  We are very happy to announce that episode #21 is THE WESISODE!!!  This time around we are taking a look at three movies by the talented Texas-born director Wes Anderson.  My movie choice was “Moonrise Kingdom” and Paul’s pick was “The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou.”

“In this movie I play an explorer of the oceans of the world, but it is NOT based on Jacques Cousteau…”

We also picked “Rushmore,” and we both chose it for the simple reason that we both wanted to talk about it.

“My performance in Rushmore? You’re welcome.”

Of course when you talk about these movies you are also talking about Bill Murray, who stars in all three to varying degrees of success…according to one of us, anyway.

“Did someone mention my name?”

Also: we talk about what we’ve been enjoying lately entertainment-wise, Paul’s mom Teri sends a message, and we announce the movies we’ve picked for next time (hint: they’re both jazz music-related).

Won’t you join us?


Moonrise Kingdom – 2012


The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou – 2004


Rushmore – 1998